When we arrived home my copy was waiting on my doorstep in an identical slim brown box with the Amazon logo on the side. It didn't take me long to finish reading it. Traversing through Hinson's life gave insight into the development of his philosophical/theological ideas and prayer practices. Unlike many third party biographers, Hinson proved to be a skilled guide through the difficult moments of life as well as those which were joyous.
My first J-term class at Southern Seminary was under the tutelage of Hinson. During those short - and quite cold - three January weeks we looked back over the ages to examine Prayer in Christian History. I still have my red three inch binder that served as both journal and portfolio for the class. It was in that class that I learned my eastern leaning ideas about prayer and even theology are not that abnormal - well, not abnormal in some circles at least. In his strained morning voice Hinson told us about his ideas of prayer as offering our "love energies" to God in whose presence all of the other "love energies" from other prayers were combined and directed by God towards the object of our prayers. Though I still don't understand exactly how prayer works, somehow praying increases my capacity for love and for seeing love all around me. And somehow, it does work, making a difference in the lives of those for whom I pray.
Being a visual person, I grasped at the simple practice introduced to me in that class of imagining lifting up someone for whom I was praying - intercession - and placing them into the outstretched arms of God, then, in my mind's eye, watching as God hugged that person close, cradling them in God's lap, filling that person with God's grace and healing love. I am often uncomfortable when someone asks me to pray for them or for a loved one. Usually such requests are too specific; "pray that God will heal him" or "pray that I will get his particular job." I'm sorry, but such things are beyond my scope of wisdom and demand that I tell God what to do. I have trouble offering such prayers. Instead I have found over the years that when someone asks me to pray for them I use this act of visualization as my prayer. Doing so does not necessitate me knowing what is best or presuming to tell God how to intervene. It leaves the action and the wisdom up to God. When I am at my most rational, I find it much more comfortable to allow God to be God and me to be me. I get confused enough just wearing the few human hats that I carry around. I don't need to try to take over God's job too!
In Hinson's class, which he has taught in lots of places through the years, he also introduced us to Pierre Theihard de Chardin and his process theology. While I don't completely agree with all of the thoughts of this deep Catholic thinker, I embrace the idea that we are co-creators with God. There is not enough space here to go into that in deep detail (maybe a later blog). However, I learned that through my prayers I can affect the world through the extension of my love back to God. In the process I come to know God more fully and my capacity for love and for God increases. In a way I become more of an incarnation of God's love, of God's self through prayer and communion with God.
Perhaps the best moments in Hinson's classes was at the beginning. He always opened each class with a reading, a period of silent prayer, and a spoken prayer (often read). Sometimes we would journal during the exercise. Other times we would sit and meditate. Raised a good Southern Baptist I didn't encounter written prayers (other than those in the bible) until I went to the Episcopal church with my fiancé where she was the organist while in college. I was shocked that all of the prayers were not only formulaic, but were actually written in a pew book! Over the two years she held that job I developed a good friendship with the rector and had some great conversations with him about our different traditions of prayer. I learned a great deal and my prayer life was deeply enriched. Each morning, fresh from his three mile walk to campus, Hinson read devotionals or prayers from the greats in Christian history before we dived into the lesson of the day. He also read some modern writers like Bailie and Quoist. I still use these from time to time today in my own devotions and in teaching students. Quoist's prayers were so simple. They were more prayer-as-observation-turned-communication-with-God. His first book, simply titled Prayers contains prayer for the blackboard, Prayer for the new baby, and prayer for a magazine. In one of the chapter introductions Quoist pleads with readers, "that all of life would become a prayer." His writing gave me new insight into what might be meant by the apostle Paul's astonishment to "pray without ceasing."
As sometimes happens, while reading Hinson's book I was introduced to and ordered some more books including a few on prayer. One I have been meaning to get for a few months now, but I kept forgetting to actually buy it was Anne Lamott's new book on prayer - Help Thanks Wow: The Three Essential Prayers. I've been a fan of Lamott for the last few years. I was introduced to this remarkable writer by one of my students who would occasionally walk into this Campus Minister's office, worn copy of a Lamott book in hand, and read alound some of her favorite passages to me. I've heard tell that I am not the only person in Elissa's world who has had the privilege of being read passages of Lamott's writings. Help Thanks Wow is a quick read. Like her other works it is conversational and down to Earth. Her writing emerges from her experiences, and, if you know her work, you know that "experiences" means "struggles." Lamott did not obtain her theology or faith from books, she came about them the hard way - she earned them through the ups and (mostly) downs of life.
Lamott begins the book with a confession: "I don't know much about God and prayer, but I have come to believe, over the past twenty-five years, that there's something to be said about keeping prayer simple" (p. 1). I have come to believe that simplicity in prayer is not only best, but it is the only thing that keeps me centered on God. Lamott makes the case well for the three essential prayers. I could sum up most every prayer I have prayed into her three words - Help, Thanks, or Wow. But she also adds "Amen" as a last chapter - the resolute "so be it" to end a prayer, which, often is enough on its own. It can be a prayer of acceptance or completion. It can be a praise or a curse. It can be a shout of acclamation or a sob of grief. So for me there are four essential prayers given in her book.
From Hinson's book I was reminded that perhaps the most essential - and simple - act of prayer is just sitting in the presence of God. Some call this meditation, others contemplation, or as Brother Lawrence aptly deemed it, "practicing the presence of God". I find the best moments of prayer are not those that are planned, scheduled, or set apart. The best times of prayer for me are serendipitous periods on my bike, driving the car, walking the dog, or pausing while reading a book or sitting at my desk to breathe deeply of God's pervasive presence, inviting God to enter into my daily grind, to be a part of each activity, and realizing that God has been there all along. For me meditation or contemplation is simply the realization that God is with me and is constantly speaking if I would only pay attention to that still small voice whispering in my ear. It is the act of turning my attention to God and resting there. Sometimes such experiences are revelatory, but most often they are just restful and peaceful. And that is enough.
Both of these books have reminded me of the important, no, the essential nature of prayer in my life. No matter how or when you choose to pray, simply do it and do it simply! Make all of life a prayer. Learn to see as Lamott has and Hinson has, that life is but one grace layered atop another. Prayer, through simply learning to see God all around us, and grace, through offering God's love and hope to others, is one of the keys to a full and meaningful life!
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