Be present; enjoy the "now"

On the Weekend Edition radio program this morning I was fascinated by an interview with Will Self, the self-described Modernist author of Umbrella. The novel is written in a first person stream of conscious format. There are no chapter breaks and few paragraphs. When the interviewer asked him about the structure of this novel he replied that he sought to mirror lived experience. Self suggested that people watch too much media and read too many novels that imply that life is linear and is marked by dramatic climaxes upon which everything changes. He observed that life is just not like that. Life is only immediate experience. Life is what happens in the present. Yes, current experience is interpreted by past experiences, but life is made in the now.

I think he is right. Many of the problems in society are the result of dissatisfaction from unmet expectations of ourselves and of other people. The messages that bury into our subconscious lead us to believe that our normal lives are boring, or worse, meaningless and unimportant if we cannot readily trace the dramatic high points of life in our linear time line. We expect every new experience to build upon and eclipse those in the past. We expect to climb the corporate ladder, making more money with each step, ever moving forward and higher in status and title. We expect to advance in every endeavor. We expect each year to be better than the previous year. Relationships and marriages end because the dramatic romantic spark is gone. When the inevitable mundane of ordinary life sets in partners get restless, begin questioning if the relationship is right, and, if nothing changes, they begin fantasizing about what-might-be, what-should-be. Over time, unsatisfied partners begin looking at others and fantasizing about how life with a new partner might be different, might fulfill the "need," maybe even the right, for ongoing and increasing excitement and drama. 

I am a dreamer. I am constantly asking "what if?" I love to tweak, improve, and change things. I enjoy adding on and building new things. I'm not much a fan of "status quo." I like change - especially if I have a part in authoring the changes. I thrive on thinking about possibilities. As a result, I daydream often. I think this is one of my greatest strengths. I can enter into almost any situation and improve it. I can problem solve like few others! Yet, this tendency can also cause problems. At times I am so busy thinking about possibilities that I miss what is actually happening in the here and now. This is an issue because before changing something it would be helpful to really understand what is actually going on! It is sometimes nice to actually relax and enjoy present experiences, and more-so, the people that I am with in the present. 

Over the next few weeks I am going to try to focus on the now, to enjoy the present. As Robin Williams' character in the Dead Poet's Society suggests, quoting Thoreau, I am going to try to "suck all of the marrow out of life," out of each experience, each relationship.
I am going to enjoy the moment.
I am going to be here, now, instead of always looking ahead.
I'm still going to exercise my ability to tweak and improve, but I am going to do that mindfully, not constantly.
I'm going to put down my book, iPad, or phone when my wife or kids are in the room.
I'm going to turn away from the computer when someone comes into my office.
I'm going to look deeper when I feel boredom coming on.
I'm going to try to enjoy the mundane, to find meaning and enjoyment in the simple things, to stop and smell the roses, relish the downtime, get to know folks on a deeper level, to actually try to be present in the now.